Exposure

The good news the great news is that 8 against 8 raised $13,759.

I love my job, I love my job, I love the bugs at my job. As long as I keep saying that things will be OK. This is actually more of a note to me. So today between the hours of 1300 and 2100 on October 30 2008 I meet some good bugs. I was in and out and in and out and in and out ( get your mind out of the gutter) of a room today and on the last run in there a nurse came up to me and said, " one of the patients in here is being moved to a private room, the doc thinks she has TB." Whoopee, if Honey did not like my hair I would have pulled it out then and there.

Then today between the hours of 1300 and 2100 I went to a room that had a nice tiny little sign "droplet precautions". So on go the gloves, the mask, and the pretty (read ugly as sin) yellow dress. OK, so its not really a dress it is a long sleeved, open in the back hospital type gowns. See photo above. Get in the room and the nurse says to me. "They don't know what she has they think it might be encephalitis." What the he!! is going on? I know that encephalitis is not airborne but some of the things that cause it can be. What they don't know is what caused it.

This week alone I have come across more and more nasties than I have in a long time. Bacterial meningitis, salmonella, TB, encephalitis, e.coli, not to mention the more normal ones. MRSA, VRE, 2 cases of the flu, colds, sinus infections, and more. Thank the frogs I am not a hypocondrac.

Marriage means to me

With all of the talk on marriage and the rights that go along with it I thought I should write about what marriage means to me. The me that got stupidly hitched at 19 because that is what I thought I should do. The me who when he left me pregnant became a single mom. The me who did not for years even think about a relationship, because the kid came first. The me who for several months lived in a homeless shelter with a small child. The me who held nontraditional jobs, like fire support for ground and air firefighters.

Personal, I am scared to get married. I don't want to disappoint Honey, I don't want to hurt her. I don't want her to one day wake up regretting marring me.

Marriage is to me an acknowledgement of our love. It is me telling others that I love this woman so much that I am willing to stand up and tell the world of my love for her.

Marriage to me means being with her when facing the hard times. Taking care of her when she needs it.

Marriage means compromise. Accepting her for her, and giving her space when she needs it. It means realizing that you are both individuals working toward a common goal. Marriage means working through the misunderstandings or finding a way to live with the two different points of view.

Marriage means growing as both a couple and as individuals.

Marriage means sitting at a hospital for all hours. It means fixing her favorite meal when she is sick. It means having someone to hold in the dark scary times. It means that after death the survivor will get the respect of being a widow.

Marriage to me means that my love is as important as your love.

8 and Movies

Thank you to everyone who donated, and read, and posted about 8 against 8. I don't know what the total is but I do know it is more than $8,000. Woohoo!!

Now on the the topic that is going around work this week. What should I bring to a Halloween potluck? I want to take something so that they won't ever ever forget me. I was thinking lung cancer cake or something equally nasty with out all the work.

Speaking of nasty, one of the things at work we have been talking about is scary movies. I love a good scary movie. I don't mean a gory one filled with blood and guts and oozy things I see that at work all the time. Gory movies are not scary or entertaining they are more like a bad documentary. I am not allowed to watch them with family anymore. My family sits around and says things like "eewww" or "what is that?" They really don't like it when I say "That evisceration with the chain saw was not deep enough to show the kidneys. Oh, and where are the reproductive organs? Movie makers seem to forget those." Gory movies are like a bad day when I was an EMT.

I want movies that are scary enough so that at night when in bed alone every little noise from the fridge starting up to the car alarm 5 doors down makes me want to get up, turn on all the lights, shove a holy book under my bed, and have a death grip on a baseball bat until the sun comes up. That is the kind of movie I want to see. I do think that the movie studios have quit making them.

Some of the ones that I like that are hard to find on DVD are... Watcher in the Woods, The Cat People (1942 version) , and The Haunting (1963). What are some of yours?

Waaaateeer

I have decided that with all of the talk about politics and just how serious things are getting in the news that I would change things here for a bit. I thought about telling a ghost story but I want to write it out, get it right before I tell it. Then I thought about a joke of some sort and realized that I am not good at telling those either.

So tonight I went shopping, I needed just a few things. I used the self check out as I had gotten under 5 items and it was close to closing time. I got some cleaning supplies, 2 bottles of water as my brother and I were thirsty, and ice cream. The cleaning supplies, ice cream all scanned well. The water we had to enter in the UPC code. After typing the code into the machine it spoke phonetically. I thought that I was going to pee.

The machine sounded like something on Sesame Street. It said "put the Waaaateeer in the bag." Waaaateeer. Drawing out the vowels making sure that I understood that I needed to bag my waaaateeer. Not my ice cream or my cleaning items my waaaateeer.

Riot

I am worried and frightened, about what is going to happen in the next two weeks. The election is a big part of it and if I had thought I would have requested Nov. 4th off. I do not want to work that day. I hope and pray that I am wrong, that my fears are ungrounded. I however am not sure that they are.

On the 4th I am packing a bag in case I have to stay at the hospital. This election to me seems more volatile than the ones in the past. Yes, I am worried about who is going to be in office, the state of the economy, if I will ever be able to marry my Honey. Will I be able to get a car that is not falling apart, will the sun come up tomorrow (ok that was tossed in there).

What I am worried about is the outcome of the election. Not who is elected, I will have my say. The reaction of people when the results come in. The hospital that I am working in is full, packed, no empty beds and they just opened up a new wing with 37 beds.

What happens if there is rioting? I hope and pray that this feeling I have is wrong, that there will not be rioting.

8 and a sad sad need to get angry about article

Have you donated yet? I have. Donated for 8 Against 8. Not only is there the ballot measure in CA but one in AZ and FL too. The one in FL is scary with the way that is worded. I don't have a quote for that but I am sure that it is out there on the net somewhere, or that someone knows what I am talking about.

Talking about scary things, Honey sent me this news article and while I do not like to post about some thing that I cannot talk about I think that this is worth a read. Be warned I cried when I read it, and I am not talking happy tears. Women in the Congo.

8 Against 8

I have not gotten political on my blog before. I have tried not to, there is enough out on the net without my saying anything. On this I am going to get political. Honey and I in June got engaged, I asked her to marry me when we were on vacation. I live in Washington state, where Deno Rossi has stated that if he gets elected Governor he will veto a marriage bill, and try to roll back existing protection for GLBT. Honey lives in CA. I am going to move down there in the summer and then eventually we will get married.

I want to marry her more than I want to get a fully loaded 2009 Dodge Challenger.

So from October 20 to the 27Th. 8 bloggers are trying to raise $8,000. This sight 8 Against 8 or any of the blogs listed below can link you to where to donate. They are not asking for everything that you have $1 will help.

Grace Chu and Grace Rosen - Grace The Spot

Lori Hahn - Hahn At Home

Kelly Leszczynski - The Lesbian Lifestyle

Dorothy Snarker - Dorothy Surrenders

Pam Spaulding - Pam’s House Blend

Sinclair - Sugarbutch Chronicles

Riese - This Girl Called Automatic Win

Renee Gannon - Lesbiatopia

I miss you

*** Honey wrote and sent this too me. I did ask and she did say I could put it up here. This is one of the many many many reasons that I love her.****

I love you and I miss you so very much.

I miss that look of incredulity that precedes you shaking your head and rolling your eyes or laughing your ass off when I come up with something totally off the wall.

I miss having my friend with me when I go shopping - for food, clothes, whatever - to say Look at this! Did you see that? Have you ever!?!? over whatever catches my eye...

I miss sitting on the beach with you, watching the endless waves break on the sand...

I miss coming home to you at the end of a long, hard day to relax in your arms. Or to have you come home after a trying shift and watching you as you sit with me to unwind. (OK - I know we haven't actually done that yet, but in my mind's eye it's happened so many times already...)

I miss cooking with you; "Do you think I should add this, Why don't you try some of that, Let me have a taste, What do you think of this recipe, You'd better turn the fire off under that pan or by the time I let you out of bed it will have burned" as I drag you toward the bedroom...

I miss the softness of your skin, the strength of your arms around me, the so-right feeling of my arms around you, my lips on yours. The subtle sweetness of the taste of you. The dreamy look in your eyes when I touch you here... and here...

I miss the look in your eyes - love, desire, lust - when you look at me as I relax and completely surrender to you.

I miss falling asleep in your arms after we've made love. Being tucked back against you, feeling your warmth surround me, your arm around me, keeping me close to you and safe.

I miss waking up in the middle of the night to feel you reaching out to touch my back ever so lightly, as though you're afraid to wake me yet still need to reassure yourself that I really am there, that I didn't disappear in the night like some figment from a dream.

I love you and I miss you so very much.

Work

This is not a nice story so be warned.

A few months ago a man and his wife came into one of the hospitals that I work at. He was very upset and so was she. He had an accident in the beginning of the year, and as he could not afford the $35 co-pay did not go to see the doctor. Now months later in the hospital the ER doc's told him that he was going to loose both of his legs below the knee. They also said that if he had gotten checked out when the accident happened he would not be in this position.

He has to have the operation or he will not live. So the papers as signed, the date is set. However, before he goes in there are some questions that have to be asked and answered so that he can be better taken care of and get the right medication.

Keep in mind he has a job, a wife, health insurance but can not afford the co-pay.

So the standard questions are asked. Do you have any medication allergies? Then eventually the social questions are asked. These may seem invasive but they do help look of and stop potential problems both during and after the operation. Like needing nicotine replacement. So on to the social questions.

Do you smoke and do you drink? Yep to both. I do remember that he said each night he drank 2 big glasses of vodka. When asked how big he said about the size of a large soda glass. But he could not spend the copay to save his legs.

Sometimes I really really hate my job. Although it is not my job that I hate it the the choices people make.

This Weekend

This weekend was great. On Saturday I went out for breakfast to a little place called The New Moon Cafe. Oh I love their food, they have real wild blackberry jam. I wish I could buy it in bottles. Then after a short walk I went to my bath and massage appointment. A half hour soak in a tub where the water comes up to my chin then an hour long massage. The only thing that would have made that better is if Honey were the one doing the massaging.

Then I went shopping. I put something red, blue and yellow on layaway. Went to the bookstores and got a few things. Nothing much there, a new day planner, copy of Curve, a copy of The Cross Stitcher and a coffee.

By the time I got home it was the afternoon and I got some great shots of the grounds here. When I have the energy and the time I will post the pics.

Sunday I spent at home in my grandfathers rocker working on a cross stitch project and watching movies and TV shows. A great weekend.

Another Post on Breast Cancer

I know that today is national out day. OK, I am a lesbian I am madly in love with my girlfriend. She lives millions and millions of miles away (that is an exaggeration she is in CA, and I am in Olympia WA).

The other post on breast cancer is about the Dr. Susan Love Research Foundation she is seeking an Army of Women for some interesting research in breast cancer. She is looking for one million women to participate in healthy breast research. That way the scientists can study what is healthy, and hopefully be able to spot the subtle changes in breast tissue. I have signed up and so has Honey. I am going to see if I can get some of the others that I know to sign up as well. I have some emails to get out.

Breast Cancer

This month is breast cancer awareness month. The hospitals where I work are having games, walks, and other fundraisers for raising money for a cure. I for many of these events have to work and so will not be able to participate in them. There are also scrubs, and other items that I can buy where a percentage of the cost goes to cancer research.

All of that is well and good however, none of the shirts that the nuns are willing to sell fit my personality. So I go to a shop called Torrid. There I bought a shirt that says Boobs Rock. Twenty percent goes to breast cancer and depending on who sees me wearing it I get nasty looks or thumbs up. My profile picture is now a photo of my shirt.

Monday night

Monday night I went to a book signing in Seattle. It was for the author Christopher Paolini and his new book Brisingr. My son is a huge fan of this authors and if I had not made the "get A's and B's" deal with him I would have not gone. I got there at 6:30 and all ready there was a line around the block. Now this was not an open event attendees had to have tickets.

Once in the Knights of Seattle put on a good show. The only think I heard them complain about was that the horses would not fit into City Hall so no jousting. After the show Paolini came out and talked for a bit. He is a gamer for those interested. Read a few chapters from his new book and then at about 8:30 started to sign books. I got out of there at 11pm.

My son is thrilled that I got the book signed for him. I just wish that he could have been here for that (long story). Yes, I have a kid a teenager.

Also on the home front I have gotten a contract at a hospital in Federal Way. I have the most strange hours ever. I work from 1300 to 2100. I was told that the shift is normally from 1500 to 2100 but they could not get anyone to take that as a 30 hour week. What I don't understand is why they did it that way. Why not extend the hours to 2300? But I just fill in where needed I do not run the diagnostic imaging.

The de Young

On the 28th of September Honey and I went to the de Young for the last day of the Chihuly exhibit. She drove me up to the headlands so that I could see Golden Gate Bridge, and the city that way. We stopped for some alone time there. Then drove into the park or I should say tried to. It turns out that it was opening day for another museum there. First day is free, weee!!

Not good for us. We had tickets for 2pm after about an hour of looking for a parking spot we drove though the park to find one. There was a line of people running up the road. Honey did drop me off so that I could get our tickets and start the tour while she kept looking for a parking space.

We learned on Sunday that the line of people was over a mile long. They had to call in EMT's as people kept passing out. The museum was letting in 500 people an hour and at the end of the day over 50,000 people when through those doors. When I got home I did look up online the price of the museum ticket one adult $26. I think it would be worth the $26 to get in on a less crowded day.

Anyway, I did get some good shots of the glass that Chihuly had on display there. These are just some of the pictures that I got. I am going to have to figure out how to move the pictures where I want them one day. Then one day I am going to have to figure out how to get some of the wicked cool templates that I see on other blogs.

The Beach

These are some of the pictures that I took when Honey and I went to the beach in CA. I wish I had gotten a picture of the sand it was more like fine gravel than the sand that we have here in WA. We went to Bodega Bay and to Goat Rock beach where the Russian River joins the ocean. The wind was so strong that the birds had a hard time flying, sail boats out on the ocean seemed to be tipping in the waves. The power boats moving in slow motion. It was a wonderful day and the nights were better that however, you have to use your imagination on.